Sunday, September 18, 2011

I'm in love with a man I had a one-night-stand with 6 years ago. How do I move on from this?

This is a strange tale... I met a boy in college, and I fell madly in love with him from afar. He was what I always sought after in a soulmate. I studied him (we'll call him "Philip") like it was my major. I inquired about him, and I'd make friends with his friends just to get in "good" with him (Creepy, I know). One night he and I drank a little too much, and we slept together. For him, I think, it was just a one-night-stand. For me it was like a spark...I didn't know how to handle my emotions for him and the situation. So I distanced myself. He and I never really did speak again. But I yearn for this man. Years later I am MADLY in love with him. I'm in a relationship with another man. But I cannot move on from the aforementioned. In a perfect world (or in my sick mind), Philip and I would be together. But he is in a commited relationship, and I am too. And I don't want these feelings anymore. What steps can I take to move forward in my love life?|||I'm sure he's not that good; you have created a fantasy in your mind bc you want things to be perfect. expect...... you think you deserve better than what you have now so you have focused all that 'better' on him. I think you should decide a. is he really worth it (contact him again, even for a talk) b. come clean with your current relationship|||Go find a therapist, you have issues to resolve.|||You need personal counselling. You are in love with an idea; not a man. As soon as you were with this man you would realize he is not as perfect as you think he is.





Get the counselling.|||that's not love it's obsession.|||That's not love, that's obsession. You should go to a counselor or something. He is just a fantasy.|||Stop writing , start asking him in person.|||have better sex with someone else?|||you dont love him.. you dont fall in love with someone from afar. get some help you sound like you could be a typical stalker.|||Go to a therapist! This isn't normal, and to be honest, it's a bit crazy.|||quit being obsessed w/ this guy...maybe you should get some counseling...|||it happens to all of us get out a bit more, if you have to have a one night stand with someone else and see how he rates|||sometimes you can't have you ever contact him again.|||you need to get a grip. the "relationship" you envision yourself with involving phillip is in your head only and does not include any real life experiences that would enrich a relationship - and certainly is unfair to the man you are currently with since you cannot give him your full attention and affection.





the man you are with deserves this, so you need to recognize that your fascination with phillip is a crush and has no bearing on real life|||Counseling...I can't even remember who I was with 6 years ago.|||It's time to wake up from your fantasy world and move on . What about the guy that is in your life ? He deserves a woman who loves him for who he is and not some one stuck in a fantasy world still daydreaming about a one night stand.


I suggest that you seek therapy.

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